Wow! We have already been in Zambezi for one full week – a week that, as my fellow bloggers have so articulately described, has been packed with challenging and eye-opening new experiences, moments of speechlessness at the beauty that surrounds us, and the nurturing of new seeds of friendship. This morning, as I ran along the Zambezi River, I was struck again by the surreal “Lion King like” beauty of the grasslands stretching indefinitely beneath the rising sun. As I ran, I was followed by the chorus of “How are you?” “How are you?” “How are you?” that we have all become so accustomed to hearing every time we step outside. We have found ourselves adopting this script (sometimes even subconsciously imitating the Zambian accent) – greeting everyone we pass with “How are you? Fine. How are you?” In fact, in my very first hour in Zambezi, little Wendy who greeted me at the plane taught me how to say, “How are you? Fine” in Luvale: “Muno yoyo mwane? Kunawa.” It has become a mindless exchange, a five word greeting that follows us everywhere we go. And yet, as this phrase echoed in my mind along my run this morning, I began to ask myself – How ARE the people of Zambezi really? Beneath the script that dictates they are fine, how are they really feeling?
Coming to Zambia, I hoped the answer to this question would be happy. I wanted to believe that, as I had heard several times growing up, the poorest people in the world are the happiest. Stepping off the plane, I did see happiness. I saw hundreds of smiling children, children whose smiles outshone the evidence of poverty that covered them – tattered clothes and dirt covered bare feet. I immediately saw in the children the happiness I wanted to see in Zambia. And yet, since that first day, I have discovered that many Zambians do not share in this happiness. Although my heart continues to beg me to believe otherwise, I cannot deny that many people here are plainly unhappy.
During my homestay, I experienced firsthand life with a Zambezi family. It was not the poverty itself – the absence of running water or the realization that the entire house was smaller than my living room – that disturbed me and pulled at my heart. It was the conversation I had with twenty-one year old Moses, a young man my age. Moses told me that he and most Africans dream of moving to America and never coming back. In America, Moses said, people are not bored because they have “stuff.” In America, people are happy, and, in Africa, they are not. I wanted Moses to understand that the image of America he sees in professional sports and on television is not representative of the real America. People in America live in poverty too, and, people in America, the rich and the poor, are unhappy, too. I found myself speechless. I didn’t want to belittle his own poverty, incomparable to that back home, but I didn’t want to accept the explicit declaration that one could not be happy in Zambia.
As a part of the health education group, I had the incredible opportunity to follow home based care volunteers as they visited patients around the “Bush” or rural villages surrounding Zambezi. We met our first patient sitting on the sand outside of a small shack. Having estimated her age to be about eighty, I was struck to discover that she was only in her forties. Words simply cannot describe the experience. Every last bit of her energy seemed to be drained by the beating African sun overhead. In this woman, I saw not only the effects of the physical deterioration caused by AIDS, but also the effects of emotional deterioration. The woman’s face held an expression of absolute misery and suffering. When asked explicitly what makes her happy, she replied curtly, “Nothing. I am not happy because I am suffering so badly.” Again, I had encountered the reality of unhappiness in Africa. On the face of this slowly deteriorating woman, abandoned by her children and struggling through every day, I saw utter hopelessness unlike I have seen before.
While in Zambezi, I have seen undeniable unhappiness and hopelessness in the voices of Moses and the patients I visited. However, I have also seen hope. Amid great darkness, the light of a single star seems brighter. Similarly, in the most dark and hopeless situations, small flashes of hope shine brightly. Amid the hopelessness of the patients I visited Monday, the home based care workers themselves shone as beacons of hope. Thirty volunteer women without medical training walk miles day after day simply to check in on patients. The patients have already received medical treatment from the hospital, and it is the role of these women solely to check in on how the patient is doing and above all to offer a loving hand. Although I have only spent a brief morning with these inspiring women thus far, I believe they have shaped me already, by elucidating the importance of love in the career I hope to pursue as a doctor and in our time here in Zambezi.
These women cannot bring the physical healing that their patients so desperately need to strengthen their bodies. Yet, they bring all that they can and that is love. Healthcare I believe is only 25% medical care and 75% love. Love delivers hope even amid the most hopeless diagnosis, when a physical cure is impossible. These women shared love by travelling miles simply to sit on the same level as their patients and help them to see the unconditional dignity of their lives. As members of the health group, we thought that we would teach the home based care workers about health. However, they ended up teaching us about love, an equally or perhaps even more important component of healthcare.
The importance of love stretches beyond the healthcare setting and can help explain the work our entire group is doing in Zambezi. The “disease” we are all combatting is poverty, which we have seen results in the same state of hopelessness as does a medical disease. Like the home based care workers, we do not have an easy cure for the suffering we see. Money we throw at the community, clothes we leave behind, or even the classes we teach are not going to cure poverty. Although we cannot provide the hope of a cure, we can always provide the hope of love. When we doubt ourselves, we must trust in the power of love. I could not tell my new friend Moses how to cure Africa’s economic problems or how to find happiness, but I can continue to show him love through friendship. I trust that this love will eventually bring a form of happiness and hope greater than that brought on by physical possessions. In America and in Zambia alike people are unhappy for various reasons. It is our duty to all slow down, care enough to actually stop and find out if a friend is actually doing “fine,” and then share a little bit of love. According to a traditional Zambian proverb, “one who possesses wisdom has it in the heart, not on the lips.” Over the next three weeks, we must all devote ourselves to sharing the love in our hearts with the people in Zambezi. This is something we CAN all do.
Michelle Brajcich
Class of 2014
AGAIN…WOW!!! Michelle…thank you! I’m reading this, wiping the tears at the honesty and love that is so evident in your blog and realizing just how much happiness and love that I know you Zags are bringing to that community! Continue making the difference there even if its only for 3 more weeks! Back here you have made us all sooo happy! THANK YOU!
Ive been following your weather everyday and yes for those of you from the seattle area…you may not be as comfortable as i am being here at home or drinking your starbucks coffees, but I’m so envious of the 80 degree warmth! We had rain yesterday, today and in the forecast for the next several days…the next 8 days! So keep enjoying that sunshine on your face, enjoy the warmth, the little hands, the smiles, the different stories, the experience, all the little things, keep loving, keep dancing, and keep giving them HOPE!
Katie… Here at home I am having one of my crazy busy days…got everyone! They all say “hi” and Lola & Max have learned an “African dance” except Lola calls it her “frickin” dance 😉 can’t wait for you to see it 😉
Loves and (((hugs))) to you all!
~”Gotta go” ~
(Realizing I’m saying that here all the time now too and every time I do I immediately smile and think of you all… ;)Thanks Larry)
Ps. oh and Katie you know how good i am about keeping secrets, Christian & I have a great one;) Missing you tons! I love you!!
Michelle,
Thank you so much for your thoughtful post. You are so right about giving people your time and friendships. Im a nurse and there are so many times that a patient just needs you to sit eye to eye and give them someone to talk to and for them to be heard.I love the picture of these 30 volunteer women walking and visiting patients. These experiences will shape the doctor you will be.
We attended the info meeting about going to Zambia during the parents week-end. It was a great presentation and a beautiful slide show. The thing that stood out the most to me was the relationships and deep friendships of the past students that had traveled to Zambezi! You could tell that all of these people were truly connected. Connected for a lifetime! I knew at that time that I really wanted Hailey to have this adventure.
Keep sharing all the love in your heart! You all have so much to give!!
Hailey we miss you more than imaginable! You are always on mind. Im so proud of you!
Mom!!!
I have been waiting for you to post so I would know that you are doing OK and what the experience has been like for you and was so excited when Dad let me know it was your turn. I ran right to the computer and started reading and what you wrote fills my heart with peace that you are not only doing OK but learning so much more than we could ever teach you at home. As I get older I am becoming so much more aware that happiness in the true sense is so far removed from what we have grown to think it means. You are so fortunate to be learning this lesson at such a young age. I hope you carry it in your heart for the rest of your life. I love you my daughter and hope you have a great rest of the trip. But please do be careful!!!
-Michelle,
Bless you, that was beautiful. I too was struck by the unhappiness and bleak poverty during my stay at Gonzaga last summer though I’m afraid in my case that I succumbed to hopelessness and the shame in having first-world privilege. It is so incredible to see your commitment to providing hope by dedicating yourself to love. I remember thinking back at Freshman retreat that you were someone who was gonna kick butt out in the world. So glad to see that thought was right. All the best for these coming weeks.
Garrett- I stayed with Violet’s family during my home-stay as well. Ours was at the last weekend of our stay and their vivacious hospitality is one of my fondest memories from Zambezi. Thank you for your post.
Mateo- Jackiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeee!
…
One more thing: Do you still get called that with your hair short?
Josh- Reading through the other comments, looks like there’s a new Mrs. Wattson 🙂
Everyone-Thank you so much for your thoughtful posts. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Simply inspiring! Your insights show that you’ve experienced AGAPE love. May God bless you, your co-team members and the Zambian people you serve.
Michelle,
Your posting was an honest, unflinching look at what real life is like for billions of people on this earth. It’s real easy for us Americans to take for granted all the material blessings surrounding us and ignore the rest of the world. I believe that by doing that we deprive ourselves the opportunity to understand and practice the Christian requirement of loving our neighbors especially beyond our borders. I wish there was a requirement for every American to travel abroad to witness their brothers and sisters around the world. You folks are exceptionally lucky to immerse yourselves into another world. Your idea of Love will never be the same.
Gotta go,
Larry Newman
P.S. To truly demonstrate God’s love for the world you should gift the Zambezialenos with “Gotta go’s” every chance you get.
Michelle,
I loved to hear of your adventure thus far. Your words paint such a clear picture that I can almost feel I am there with you. I am so proud of you. Continue to spread your love and remember that there is a very special guardian angel watching over you day by day. We miss you! Fiona and I will be excited to welcome you back with open arms.
Aunt Shannon
Michelle,
Thank you for the beautiful reflection. You are experiencing the wonderful power of love for others. I am so proud of what you and the other Zags are doing in Zambezi. I share this quote from Mother Teresa as it seems so appropriate:
“We must know that we have been created for greater things, not just to be a number in the world, not just to go for diplomas and degrees, this work and that work. We have been created in order to love and to be loved.” Keep up the great work and you all will be in our prayers. Love Dad. PS Why no picture?
Michelle,
Your insight leaves me speechless.
Michelle, so glad to hear you are enjoying Zambia and that your eyes and heart are open!
Michelle!!
Such a beautiful refection! You brought me right back to that little slice of Heaven that is Zambezi. Those choruses of “How are you?” still run through my mind often. Also, Wendy is the sweetest….. but just wait till you see her dance moves!! I think that you have pointed out the most difficult part of Zambezi. The feeling of happiness is something that is unique to everyone. As you are in Zambezi you will most likely be experiencing the purest form of happiness that you have ever felt and yet you are surrounded by people that are suffering and very unhappy. It is honestly something that you will never fully understand but by looking for the ever-present hope that is in that little village, you will begin to come to terms with the dichotomy of happiness and suffering that you are confronted with everyday in Zambezi! I hope you cherish every moment of your time in Zambia because you will be home quicker than you can say nshima! I love you lots Michelle and can’t wait to catch up with you when you get home!
Megan and Ally!
I hope you are loving your time in Zambezi. I know that you are both spreading happiness to all the people that you are meeting there. Zambezi is lucky to have such a BRAVE health group!
Josh!
How’s rotting in Zambezi going for you? I hope that you have given Alex’s love to NANDEEEPA….
TEOOOOO!
I miss you dude. I hope that you have found another diva den to cuddle in (although I don’t know if anything can live up to the original)! I hope you are star gazing on the landing strip, taking long trips to the market, enjoying the sunsets, slaughtering chickens (and maybe a goat… but I think that’s Kyle’s job), and of course changing your group’s lives with the depth and clarity that you bring to every reflection. Love you!
With much jealousy,
Erin Murphy
Wow, what a beautiful reflection Michelle. So much to process in your thoughts, and I’m so glad you shared them with us.
Think of you all daily!!
Katie
Michelle, that was a beautiful beautiful post. It’s 11:40am in San Francisco and I’m just sitting in my living room, eating left overs, thinking about what to do with the day. I believe what you stated to be true; love is what makes the world go around. Love is an universal language. I believe that connecting with other people is what is most important in our lives, whether that be through a Zambian handshake, sharing a coke, greeting a person that walks by on my way to Trader Joe’s, whatever.
When I got home from Zambia last summer, my mom mentioned to me about a man that sits on the corner across from Pete’s Coffee in my town. She was always curious on what he was doing and sure enough, 5 out of 7 times, I’d see him sitting on that corner. I’ve always wondered what he was up to, too. He usually was drinking some sort of Soda from 7-11 and smoking a cigarette. After continuous pondering, I didn’t do anything about it. Finally, yesterday (so a year later from when I first noticed him), I went up to him on the way back from my run and asked what he was doing, what his name was, etc. We got in to a conversation, he showed me some of the work he’s working on and whatnot. Yes, it took me a year to dive in to conversation with this man, but I believe it is my experience in Zambezi, the desire to know people’s stories that allow me to go up to strangers and make connections with them.
Love is a universal language– amidst our brokenness, we’re all capable of it. Thanks for the post, Michelle.
Josh: sorry for the long comment, I bet you guys are all rushing to get to school or teach, but I just wanted to tell a story!! Hope you’re driving safely and having a blast!
Jason & Mateo: what-what-what-what.. what-what-what-what… (insert Thrift Shop here)
Tamryn: Hope you’re having a great time!! I’m glad you’re there and still remember when you came up to me at the CLP intro-thing, & I’m so happy you said yes to life!
Hayley: Girl, keep smiling (YOU TOO ALY!)
Conor: you’re on top of the world (yeah!)
With tons and tons and mwane amounts of love,
Hikaru
“It is our duty to all slow down, care enough to actually stop and find out if a friend is actually doing “fine,” and then share a little bit of love. ” Such an insightful statement, and true words to live by. God bless all of you for your devotion to the cause that took you all so far from home. We look forward to hearing more from each of you in the days to come. Know that many prayers are said every day you are away , for each of you, and the new freinds ( and old) that you make. Very touching reflection Michelle. Cant wait to read your reflection Conner. Hope you are well. Love and Miss you.
Michelle,
Your post was beautiful! We have enjoyed hearing about your experiences. You have so much love to share, the people of Zambezi are fortunate to have you as a visitor. We miss you tons, and are looking forward to reuniting and hearing all of your stories first hand!
Love, Nicole & Katy
Ps. I hope you are wearing your sunscreen. We are burnt to a crisp here in Hawaii!
Michelle,
Wow, you’ve left me speechless. It’s 1am in this part of the world and I’m just going to lay here for a while letting your words be absorbed by my head, heart, and soul .
Thinking of you guys and sending you lots of love,
Constanza
Michelle,
Your post has challenged and inspired me to think critically about the life I live and the life I want to live. Thank you.
Special shout out to Jason, I realize I’m probably a day late in Zambia time (but hey, isn’t that what Zambia time is all about??), HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! It’s still your birthday my time, so feel free to celebrate a little while longer.
All my love,
Kate
Michelle,
Thanks for sharing such an insightful post. It brought tears to my eyes as images of the HBC patients I visited last year came flooding back. On the other side of the age spectrum was a baby who looked to be about 3 months old and I was shocked to find out he was actually over 1 year old and suffering from HIV. I choked back tears as I held the tiny little baby in my arms, wondering if he would ever live long enough to see his first day of school. On the same round of home visits I met another little boy, about 2 years old, who despite both of his parents being HIV-positive, had miraculously avoided contracting the disease and was instead perfectly vibrant and healthy. That experience, as you so beautifully articulated, was the most profound experience of my time in Zambia. At the heart of human suffering there is a duality of sorrow, despair, hopelessness, and yet joy–despite the circumstances, resiliency, faith, and as you so candidly pointed out, love. Seeing human suffering, and not only seeing it but walking alongside those who are suffering is both a privilege and also heartbreaking. As a nurse I have cared for several patients on the last day of their lives and each time was an experience I will never forget. It was difficult to experience with them, but so touching that despite tremendous suffering there was the love of family and friends that overwhelmed the sorrow and suffering that were present. And sometimes that is all we can do, love. I really appreciated that your post highlighted some of the stark realities Zambians face. But despite the hardships there are people like the amazing men and women of HBC who give their time, miles, resources, and love to those who need it most. I think as long as there are people willing to do that–and if I know anything about the Zambian people it is that there always will be those kinds of people to volunteer–than love will abound and hope can never be lost. Blessings to you, Brittany, Mateo, Susan, the rest of the health care group, and group as a whole as you discover the suffering yet hope and love that coexist in Zambia and America as well. It is this hope and love that provide what no materialistic thing ever can. Thank you so much for the words of wisdom you shared in your post. It sounds like you are discovering what it truly means to walk with others, both giving and receiving the true love of friendship. In my experience there, I found that joy can be present in the most unlikely places, despite whatever circumstances we may be facing or whatever things we have or lack, for where there is love, there is always hope.. We’ve all heard it said that laughter is the best medicine, but you hit the nail on the head when you pointed out that it’s actually love. And love was by far the most profound characteristic I found in the Zambian people. I really like how you highlighted both aspects of shadow and light in your post. Thanks again for your sharing your experiences!
Kisu Mwane,
Melissa Houglum 🙂
Yes! Love! It is the love we share and that love we receive that impact our lives. Love can’t be measured, but it can be felt. Continue to share authentic love and it will make you and those around you happier. I can feel the love as read the blog and view the various pictures. You are awesome people full of love. You make me smile! GOD BLESS! Monte
Michelle!
I just read your post, and I am amazed. Your words about love will resonate with each and every person that reads this. Your ability to spread your love with the patients you are working with is absolutely incredible. I hope you are taking in each and every moment of this trip, and I CANNOT wait to hear all about it when you return! You are wonderful and I miss you very much!
Love, Jenny